Bella:Housewife Extraordinaire
by marisstar
Summary: AU BxE **A personal look at Bella's life after Edward and she are married and Renesmee has been born. Was being a wife and mother what she thought it would be? Will her mother in law ever get off her back?**


**TO THOSE WHO ARE READING THIS:::: PLEASE PLEASE for the love of God let me know what you think of this. I want total and complete honesty. If you have the minutes to spare. This could be a total pile of shit waiting to splatter. PLEASE let me know what you think:: Should I bother to continue it? Or move it to the trash pile? Thanks.**

Green Day "Basketcase"

--Do you have the time  
To listen to me whine  
About nothing and everything  
All at once  
I am one of those  
Melodramatic fools  
Neurotic to the bone  
No doubt about it--

I'm staring out of the kitchen window for maybe the fifth time today, angrily scrubbing the dishes in the sink. What is it about cleaning that settles me down when I'm pissed? Who knows. I'm just grateful for the fuckawesome green antibacterial soap washing away all the angst and pissed-offed-ness.

To be completely honest, if it wasn't for the distraction of writing and reading fanfiction I'd probably go running down the streets tearing out my hair and screaming. I would rather crawl into these stories about the handsome guy who loves the pretty girl and their read about their ridiculously hyped up sex drives. Those lemons get me through the days sometimes. Pining for someone to lust after me that way.

"Mom!" Renesmee yelled, grabbing my attention. She toddles up to me holding a DVD, "Barney!". (We watch this video a LOT. It's pretty much the bane of my existence.) So much has changed. I sigh and pad off to fetch a snack and put in the DVD.

Renesmee ("Nessie" to most of the closer family members-- GAG) is two now. Finally through the baby stage and onto the learning stage. Potty training, a big girl bed and getting rid of the pacifier. (Finally) It's been a struggle. Some days being a parent is hard work. It shocks me that some people have more than one.

Edward was commissioned to join the Volturi's guard. He is currently serving a role as a trainer to other members of the guard. This calling keeps him away from us from early morning to 4 p.m. Or so. I can't say I'm particularly sad about his position as it leaves me to do whatever I want all day.

He's always distracted now, too busy to be bothered by Renesmee or me. Often times, I feel ignored. I don't want to bother him with the mundane tasks. I ghost around him, making dinner and keeping up on all the housework. It's causing a rift I think. There's a real barrier between us due to the lack of communication. You can chide me all you want about not trying harder, but you should see the condescending looks I receive when trying to explain my feelings of inadequacy and neglect to _him_.

Since he has joined the Volturi guard he has changed. He had to endure a vigorous training program and be away from us for 8 weeks. It was a difficult trial for our little family. He came back a different man. If you asked him, he would probably disagree, but I'm telling you as his wife, he _is _different. He still plays the piano and researches random topics on Google incessantly; (the man has an insatiable need for knowledge) but his mannerisms have evolved into more of a 'professional' behavior. Like a zombie. At the time, we both agreed this was the best thing in our life financially and career-wise.

Edward wasn't interested in following his father's footsteps. Being a doctor just wasn't for him. Esme's blue eyes had pooled with tears when he went to tell her he had joined the Volturi. She was frightened for his life as she knew he was not able to turn down missions. When he explained that the position he accepted was in a training position instead of field work, she seemed a little relieved. However, the thought of the imminent separation of her first grandchild Renesmee broke her heart.

Edward's brothers Emmett and Jasper are both married now and getting their families started.

Emmett married Rosalie (an uptight bitch if you ask me) who already had a 5 year old daughter named Chelsey from a previous marriage. They have since added a baby boy named Liam to their little family.

Jasper met Alice (I really like Alice) in church. Jasper had been traveling a dangerous path which involved drugs and he was barely saved by Edward and his family. Meeting Alice was the best thing that could have happened to him. They were married a year after Jasper got out of rehab and they just celebrated the birth of their brand new baby boy named Zen.

Carlisle and Esme are still trucking along. Carlisle has his own practice now and specializing in pediatrics currently. Esme is working at an elementary school with autistic children and loving every moment of it.

As with all mother in laws, Esme nags me endlessly about the way I'm raising our daughter and how often I clean my house and etcetera. I fight the urge to tell her to fuck off a lot. Edward simply chooses to ignore the fact that his mother berates me at every chance she gets. (From what I hear this is average mother in law behavior) He prefers to blame in on me and reminds me to be nice. He is a big mama's boy who hasn't been able to cut the apron strings. She's his _baby._

All in all I'd say the family isn't _that_ awful. I don't get along with Rosalie at all as she chooses to interrupt me when I speak and belittle me. It gets really old. Alice and I are great friends. She loves to give me makeovers. We trade recipes regularly and try to get on the phone and talk as much as possible.

My own mother, Renee, was remarried to a younger guy named Phil many years after leaving my father Charlie. She was distant, she tries to call me while she was commuting to and from work.

Charlie has also finally remarried. A woman named Sue Clearwater who has two grown up children of her own; Seth and Leah. I've only met them a few times considering we're all busy people with families of our own to worry about.

Luckily, since Edward has joined the guard we've gotten the opportunity to move away from Forks. We aren't able to leave without the Volturi's consent; which is not given often.

We currently live in Bakersfield, California. It's generally very sunny and warm. I've made a few friends here. They're mostly fellow Volturi wives and their children. We all get together and do 'wifey' things. It's very domestic of me. (Gag)

You'd think that being away from the family bullshit and crappy ass Washington weather would attribute to me being in a perpetually good mood, alas, this is not the case.

I would really just like to be happy and I keep thinking I should continue my career in journalism. Attending college without difficulty is an absolutely absurd idea-- think about going to classes while balancing housework and a child.

I would also like to improve the relationship between Edward and I.

Am I too hard to please? Or am I just a bored housewife? I have so many questions. I try to shove them all in the back of my mind so I can confront them at a later date. For now I just mindlessly maneuver each day.


End file.
